There's no gratitude in raking mulched leaves.

I think the title of this post pretty much says it all. Raking leaves sucks, but raking leaves super sucks when your dad thinks he can get away with just mulching them with the mower, then your mom freaks out because she just fed the grass and it'll suffocate, and then it rains and you have to rake wet leaf confetti.

And then you have to hall them off. Phil took the wheel barrow.

So Nanc and i got stuck with the tarp.

Which you then have to drag all the way to the back.

The thing about raking is, at first you're like, "We'll get the whole front done today, no problem." and then five minuets passes and you're like, "Fuck this. What is an acceptable amount of time until i can tell my parents i don't want to do this anymore?" And the piles were too small to jump into. I mean COME on. But the yard looks nice.

Well, the 1/6th we got done today. At that point Nanc was like, "I release you." and Dad was like, "The key to doing this is to take breaks. I'm going to take my second break." And i was like, "You're going to go back out there today?" and he's all, "No. The second break is really long." And i was like, "I'm not doing anything tomorrow." and Nanc was all, "That's fine, but you could..." And i screamed, "NOTHING!" and she was like, "got it." Couch and Dexter it is then. bye!

It's time to eat the Turkey.

 The fam decided to take it easy this Thanksgiving, on account of the Pappas Christmas Extravaganza that is quickly approaching. Popou was basically like, "Make a reservation, kid. I take us all out." So that's what we did, at the Public House:

A restaurant that's just about as old as Thanksgiving.

We got there an hour after our reservation time, in true Pappas style. Popou was like, "The service is terrible." and dad was like, "It's a buffet." 

Earlier while Pop and Phil watched the Lions get massacred, Nanc and I went to see the new Muppet Movie. No big deal...

No big fucking deal.

Nanc gave away my giant stuffed Kermit to someone in need, and i was like, "Really? Who could be more in need of a giant stuffed Kermit then me?" He's only been my role model since we first laid eyes on each other: age 3. Laugh if you want, but i just love him. I mean who can sing all the songs from the muppet babies? Who watched the Muppet Show repeats everyday after school? Who sings along to the songs in proper muppet voices?? Huh?? (Ok, the last one was a little creepy, but you get my point.) Me, though now that i think about it it's probably for the best because i would never have gotten ride of him, and a 28 year old woman probably shouldn't have a stuffed Kermit in her bedroom. But don't worry, me and Kermit will be friends forever. Anyway, aNYway...

 Go see this movie, but first watch the original Muppet Movie, cause there are some pretty good running jokes. I mean it was pretty alright, not really any songs you came home singing, but way better then the last few shitty ones they've been trying to dump on us. I think not making a Muppet movie would have been better then Muppet Treasure Island. I know he didn't see it, but it totally warrants a Phil Pappas thumbs up.

He almost looks like a muppet in this picture. But anyway, a Happy Thanksgiving to all, and to all a good night.

Chocolat

Today i spent the day Christmas shopping, and by that i mean sitting in front of the computer in my pajamas and bathrobe looking at Amazon gift lists. I fully intended to wake up, shower, and hit the streets, but Phil decided to stink bomb the bathroom and is therefore to blame for my current condition.

Something about rainy days and bathrobes makes me crave hot chocolate, and so that's what i made today. So bust out your favorite pot, and heat up 1/4 cup of milk. Add 1/4 cup cocoa powder, 1/4 cup sugar (actually maybe a little less), and a pinch of salt. Whisk it, whisk it good:

Add 1 3/4 cup more milk, and heat it up, whisking all the while.  Pour hot mixture into two mugs, and throw some mini marshmallows in there because Hey, why not? And top it all of with a dash of half and half.

This is when i realized i hadn't used the creative whip that DPL got me for my birthday, and what the hell? Today's as good a day as any. Since we're turning fancy i decided to shave some chocolate over the top too.

We only had a Ritter Sport Stracciatella bar (limited edition), but whatever, couldn't hurt.

How delightful. Also i totally got shaved chocolate all over the counter for presentation purposes, duh. Phil seemed to like it:

I was hoping he'd get some whipped cream on his nose, but no dice. Anyway at this point he's like, "Since you're cooking you might as well make those banana breads for the Christmas Bazaar." And i'm like, "What banana breads?" and he's like, "Oh, i guess i forgot to tell you, we're supposed to make banana breads for the Christmas Bazaar. Anyway if you need me i'll be out in the gazebo." Which, whatever Phil. First i'm going back to the computer with my mug of hot chocolate and spray bottle of whipped cream to write my blog, then we'll talk. 

Nothing says "goodbye" like apple crumb pie!

So... one of my co-workers is leaving today, and I made him a pie because he's sweet as pie (but actually because i asked him what his favorite desert was and he said apple crumble and pie)! I forgot to ask him if i could use his name, so we'll just call him Petunia.

I made the crust the night before and put it in the freezer. So i get home at, like, 1:30am and i go to the freezer in the basement to get some butter (during the holiday's we bake like crazy, so when costco has a sale on unsalted butter we stock the fuck up) and i head back upstairs and almost have a heart attack because Nanc can't sleep, and decides it's a good idea to lay in wait at the top of the stairs for me. And, of course, the first thing is see is her white hair and i'm all: GHOSTS!

Anyway she can't sleep so she actually helps me peel some apples for this masterpiece i'm in the process of creating. I pull the crust i made that morning out of the freezer, and we have at those apples. Tons of people think Granny smith is the best apple for pies because they heard it from someone sometime and so it's oBviously fact. FALSE! Julia Child herself says that pies need a blend of apples to invoke all the flavors, but you can't use soft ones like macs or galas (they don't invoke that shit), so i used 2 granny smith, 2 fuji, and 2 braeburn. wonderful. 

Meanwhile i made the crumble with vanilla wafers, sugar, cinnamon, and almost a whole stick of butter:

To the apples add flour, sugar, cinnamon, and toss that shit up!

So at this point the crust is still frozen, and i'm like, "what the fuck's wrong?" and Nanc is all, "you were supposed to refrigerate it, moron." (but not exactly), the she's like, "just put some lemon juice on it and wait until tomorrow, but remember to re-heat the crumble." So that's what we do. Anyway, in the morning the crumble is hard as shit, and i of course stored it in a metal bowl, so i end up chipping 1/4 of it on the floor before i think to run the bottom of the bowl under hot water. It ends up like one giant cluster:

Meanwhile i put the pie together with gobs of butter on top.

But oBvi not enough crumble due to the previous casualties: 

Bam! 

Basically i think everything turned out OK, Petunia seemed to like it:

Later i got home, and i had apples on the brain. Luckily i had this awesome applejack:

It's made in NJ, so oBvi it's the best! Just like tomatoes, corn, and me. Pictured it's mixed with apple cider and honey. When my parent's were out in Ca, the lady who lived across the street from my cousin apparently harvested honey from bees, which they brought home with them and is outstanding. I could never do this because i'm afraid of getting stung. I mean i'm sure this lady doesn't but recognizing the spazz that i am, i oBvioulsy would. I mean no question. Anyway if you don't have a bee charmer around there's this new Honey Jack Daniels, which actually makes this an even more delicious drink, so DO IT! 

But anyway Petunia, I'm gonna miss you buddy. Good luck, and stay gold. Don't be a stranger!

Carnitas!

I found this awesome carnitas recipe which led me to this awesome website, which led me to pickled jalapenos, which is just awesome. 

You can follow the directions from the links. Anyway to go with the Jalapenos i'm making black bean soup with toasted cumin la crema, green onion slaw ala Bobby Flay, the carnitas (oBvi), and for dessert arroz con leche which i keep calling rizzo con leche because: that's greek baby.

That was the start of the soup, how colorful! Anyway add that with dried black beans and one ton of water to a slow cooker and you're well on you way.  Here's the crema:

Start boiling that pork, it's Carnita's time!

Meanwhile soak the shit out of some rice:

 

So we started selling condensed milk at work We do a product tasting periodically, and one day i can in and they were like, "we tasted the condensed milk." And i was like, "What, why?" because that sounds gross. But anyway they had it with honey bread and said it was "a real treat." So i was curious, and dug my pinky finger into the can, and you know what? it is a real treat! i can't even imagine it with honey bread.

So let it thicken, and then put it in the fridge to chill. Meanwhile czech out those carnitas!!!

Then go ahead and make your own tortillas, like a boss. 

We bought a real rolling pin. Time to blend the fuck out of your soup, and top with the Cumin Crema:

Course 1:

I don't always prefer to drink dos equis but one time i was on a cruise with Scotty and Danielle, and we bought some rediculously overpriced beer. Anyway i got a Bass, which i normally don't really go for, but this one tasted like carmel apples, i swear it, and Scotty got a Dos Equis and it was oBviouly skunky. It was just rediculous how actually delicious the bass tasted and how terribly bad the Dos Equis was.  Anyway it was the last night, so the bartender goes to Scotty, "I'll give you your money back but sorry man, the kegs are tapped." and he was like, "Fuck it, i'll just drink the beer." He'd gotten through about half of it, and we had just been to the buffet and had this thing of mustard:

So i was like, "I'll tell you what i'm gonna to do for you Scotty, i'm going to grow out my hair. But in the mean time if you eat this container of mustard, i will trade my ridiculously delicious beer for your absolutely revolting one. And:

He did it.

Best bet i've ever made.

 

How fucking delightful is that?  Anyways when we were little i had this dog, Danny dog. It was my Aunt's that she rescued from the pound and she named her Danielle after my grandfather Dionysus Papayioryou but after Ellis Island Dan Pappas and sometimes Denny for people with a greek accent. For some reason she couldn't keep her, and gave her to my parents who were pregers with my sister, Danielle, who was so named for the same reasons. So, they decided to change one of their names, and i guess Danny Dog picked tails. Anyway i had this whole story for you that probably would have been great to tell at parties. I mean i was to the point where i actually scanned in a pic, but now it's lost to me and i just have this picture of my dog, so there you go: 

 Hey, here's desert:

Beautiful.