PFV Day 2: Driving

Initially we had big plans to play gin rummy then go to DQ after the restaurant, but then we got home, and everyone fell asleep, except Danielle because she needed ear plugs from Phil's snoring. Sometimes Phil snores so loud he wakes himself up. But when we were all dozing off I was all, "Well, if we wake up early we can see the sunrise!" And Nanc took this to mean, 'At 5am i'll wake everyone up for the sunrise!' Which is exactly what she did.

Wow, beautiful. Then we all went back to sleep, except for me because i wish i knew. Luckily Phil's an early riser, so eventually we took a walk along the beach and found a statue of Neptune (originally known as Poseidon), and vowed to the God of tidal waves and seaweed that we would bring everyone back after breakfast.

Breakfast time:

Here everyone has that, "What are you talking about?" look, so i imagine Nanc is saying something really interesting. If only i knew...

Then i was like, Nanc! Take a picture of me eating grits in front of the ocean, you know, like southern people do!

Wow, look at that ocean, it's so blinding!

 Then we saw dolphins...

Danielle: Look at the dolphins! When Scotty and I went to Hawaii they had spinner Dolphins just out in the ocean.

Dad: Oh yeah, it’s like a sea world show. Your mom and I saw that too.

Danielle:  In Hawaii?

Dad: No, in Florida.

Danielle: At Seaworld?

Dad: maybe.

 Walk time! I found this really cool flower of my hair!

I have just the bow to go with it.

Then we get to Neptune, and our vows are completed. So i'm like, "Dad, get a picture of him dropping the turtle on our heads!

And that's good, but you totally cut off half the statue. So i was like try again. and it took forever, but then randomly he's like... I got it. And i was like, "What? were we even poseing?" and he's like, "Yeah!"

Ok, i don't even know what i'm doing here, probably recreating the "What are you talking about look," but certainly not posing.  So i'm like, "Dad. You have to do this again."

Take 3:

So in an attempt to hide her cup from the camera Danielle's look turned from "Ahhh, don't!" To "I say stop this insanity!" But you know what? Good enough.

Go team Pappas! Ba-nA-Na-NA-na!

 So then we're on the road again. This time Nanc is driving, and she's crazy! She keeps trying to look for maps and paper directions and swerving all over and shit. Meanwhile Danielle's in the pasanger seat with her iphone, trying to give the correct directions. So dad and i do the appropriate thing in this situation, which is to sing country songs at the top of our lungs. Suddenly we quick swerve, and we all look at nanc, who has somehow got a map folded under the steering wheel in attempts to find various routes. And Danielle wanted to kill everybody (legit) so she's all, "Give me that! Just drive." and grabs the map and hides it. You gotta do what you gotta do.

Dad: "We're going to Carolina. Can't you feel the sunshine... can't you just taste the Pork Rinds."

Mom: "Can it, Phil." I laughed SO hard! ha.

Dairy Queen Break:

 Perfect shot. Listen, if you're going to get a Blizzard, it's got to be Vanilla ice cream (Soft Serve!) and Reese's Peanut Butter Cup, because every other blizzard pales in comparison. I discovered this at age 8, and it still holds true.

 So then we have this brilliant plan to get BBQ. This is a plan i've had since this trip was just a small ounce of energy in the backseat of my brain. You go to Carolina, you get BBQ. I've been talking about BBQ for, like, two month's straight. At one point Nanc is all, "Are we getting BBQ in Georgia?" and Phil's all," Georgia? That's sissy BBQ. We goin' to Carolina!" So i look up the best place on our route.

Look closely at that white part of the sign, and... it's Monday. I don't want to talk about it.

Then i take a nap because we're listening to Stephen King's 11/23/63, and while the story is really good, it's slow and there's way too much detail/unnecessary dialogue. Then i wake up and there's a farm stand! Life's getting better already.

 Peach cider!

All kozy. I love peach beverages. If you want to know what the best Peach beverage in the world is, it's the Peach Nectar they serve at cracker barrel, but it's only seasonally, you gotta search that shit out. 

When i'm driving Phil like to do crazy things like put his hand right in front of my face pointing out the driver side window and is like, "Look at that!" and, like tell me to slow down and stuff. At one point we get stuck behind like seven trucks on a two way highway, and Phil's all, "Look at this shit show! Those sons of bitches, get over!"

Then Danielle's like, "OK, we're going to take exit 5 onto 17S and it'll be 15min's to Georgia." Then immediately after she stops talking:

Dad: What exit?
Mom: Which Highway are we taking?
Dad: How long until we reach Georgia?
Danielle: Can anyone in this family hear?!

 And i nearly pulled a Nanc swerve, but from laughter.

And then it was clear that we had been driving for 8 hrs, and needed to get somewhere fast. And we do! Welcome to the Oglethorpe hotel in Savannah, Georgia!

We get there, and Dad's all, "Stay in the car, i'll take care of this!" and runs out. Then, like 5min later he comes out of know where, and opens the back door, where Nanc is oBliviously reading and is like, "AHHH!"

And we're like, Why didn't you just open your door?" and he's like, "I wanted to be clear." Okay. Time to unload!

The elevator door totally almost slammed shut in my face.

Dad's in charge of unloading, he's like: first trip is Nanc's stuff!

Kidding. But why do we have so much stuff? The world may never know.

Weeping willows and Spanish moss!

There's a ton of Spanish moss out here, and whenever it appears someone says, "Look, Spanish moss!" and then Phil sings, "La-da-Da-da-DA... the Spanish mosSSS!" It happens alot.

Then i found this place online called Sweet Potatoe's. So we went for some Southern cooking dinner, and it was delish!

I had Gumbo with black eyed peas and collard greens. Danielle had this peach glazed chicken with cheese grits and okra, and mom and dad split blackened catfish with baked sweet potato with brown sugar and tons of butter that was sent from the heavens. And they had this beer sweetwater 420 pale ale that i've been dying to try.  This place was SOOO good, so i guess everyone misses bbq for a reason, plus we're going on the way back, NO JOKE.

Dessert:

Chocolate Chip Pecan Pie, Sweet Potato Pie, and Banana Pudding (man v food says this is the best banana pudding on the planet, but disagree. Still delicious though). The CCPP was DIVINE, and wins the Pappas best dessert of the day award (and that's quite the honor).

Meanwhile, back at the Oglethorpe:

So then we get to the hotel, and Phil's like: Alright girls, this is your room:

Guess i'll take the chair, dick (Kidding). But then i was getting changed this morning and i was like, "Dad, don't come into this room." And of course he's like, "What?" and walks directly in, and Danielle's like, "Can anyone in this family hear?"  Then i was like, "Danielle, heAr's the thing (ba-dom CHING!): you have to know in this family as soon as you say something, you are going to have to immediately repeat it in segmented questions, but once you accept this everything will be okay." Then she punched me in the face and we went to catch our trolley.