Today me and Nanc woke up and were both like, "Let's buy a juicer!" We both just sat up in our beds at the same time (9:16am EST, roughly) with the same staggering thought. And thus the fates aligned and so our story begins.
Okay, so actually we had planned this last week when we found out they were on sale, anyway...
So oBvi we couldn't just buy one and not use it, duh. Everyone knows you use it everyday for a day and then put it in the closet to collect dust until one day you need it for a really awesome recipe you found and you finally track it down someplace that nobody would ever put it and it's broken for no reason and you forgot to register for the two year warranty because no way you still have the receipt for that crap and you fall to your knees, and shaking your fists into the sky you shout "WHYYyyy!!!" in a really echo-y way. Everyone know that.
Nanc: Let's make cocktails!
Me: Okay! (Phil enters the room) Dad, what kind of cocktail do you want?
Phil: Potroast?
Nanc: As a cocktail?
Phil: Oh, i thought you were asking me what i was thinking about.
So we decided to make this cocktail which i may have made on this blog before but can't remember/bother checking, and anyway it's delicious.
It's the Cucumber Fizz, as you may have guessed. Also i'm still trying to remember how I juiced the cucumber, because i've definitely made this before, but it remains a mystery. Probably involving ghosts.
So first we were going to Target, but then the time got away from us (Martha Stewart Living and Front Gate came in!) and we were on a strict schedule.
Check out this totally awesome outdoor pizza oven i would get except it's $4000 and why not just build a real one for the same price or less or buy a car:
Well, all you billionaires know where to find it for your next pizza by the pool party.
So then we had to go to Walmart because it was closer to the movie theater, but the low end juicer there was totally not there, so we checked out kohls instead, and they had one for even cheaper and i only had to spend $26 and not give it to the devil (I hate Walmart, everything about them is wrong).
By then Pompeii is starting:
Which is pretty much exactly how you imagine it is.
And before you know it:
It's Juicing time!! (well, with a brief segway to the produce mart and the liquor store, but honestly that part was pretty boring.)
Czech out this sweet juicer in action!
Oh yeah.
This recipe doesn't call for pear juice, but when given the opportunity why wouldn't you add pear juice? What are you, a communist? No, because even they appreciate a delicious cup of pear juice, i'm sure.We got Anjou, Asian Pears (which taste like nothing when you juice them, (turns out))
But also the pear section had prickly pears!! which i'd never seen before or wasn't a memory worth keeping. oBvi i hAd to have one.
They're better when they're not juiced as well, FYI.
Also i didn't clean out the juice between the prickly and the lemon i was juicing and thus discovered the coolest lemon juice color ever.
It's like italian ice, but with out the sugar or the ice.
So much juice!!
Now i don't normally like the Vodka, because it smells/tastes like gross, but you have got to try La Poire. It smells more like a ripe pear then a ripe pear. I mean how is that even possible? It is though. And it's delicious. That and St Germain which is made by old men on bicycles collecting Elderflowers in the summer of Paris. What else could you ask for in a liquor?
Boom.
That's actually the second drink i made. The first one i cut the cucumbers to thick, then i didn't realize you have to drop them in the glass in between layers of ice so i ended up poking through some of them with a wooden spoon handle. Whatever. They're man-ly, so i gave it to Phil.
I handed it to him, and he did his signature Phil thumbs up, but i was like, "No, you have to drink it!" Which resulted in this:
How relaxing. Also Nanc made Poncit, which dad was like, this so reminds me of being in an Asian restaurant, and Nanc was all, it's Philipino. Which: Close, but no cigar.
Cheers!
And then my bacon of the month club arrived.
The end.
